Friday, July 30, 2010

And here it is, The truth of Me.

Since starting this blog, I do not feel that I've put any of my true self within these writings. But today is the day:)

Some many things have led me to the place where I currently am. So many roads that I thought were ludicrous, that were littered with tears and laughter, I know realize were part of God's bigger picture for me. God knew what he was doing when he sent me to Florida. I've made this town my home. This place of acceptance, of love, and of friendship. So many things that lie in my path, just wanting for me to take hold and cherish. I normally would be scared, then run away but these past years have taught me to just stick with it, not give up.

These years have brought me all kinds of things but the best thing I can say my life has thrown at me has been my friends and the chance to really feel love. A love that contains passion, sincerity, and security. There have been friendships that have lasted and friendships that faded, but each one giving me something that slowly guided and built me.

It's truly amazing how God works. He give us everything we could possibly want or need. Our God provides. In this current time in my life, I have experienced God's love and grace. It's a peace that just washes over your soul leaving all the other things behind. Like tonight at work, the other girls that I work with like to talk and gossip especially now that there is big issue regarding one of my fellow hostesses. I've been trying to stay out of it and just listen. But God just spoke to me tonight and gave me the strength to just listen and realize how blessed I really am and how I do not need to be a part of that. This was a feeling I fell in love with; true peace.

We all have the one issue that stays with us always. Mine is an issue with my heart. It's been there for a year or so and seems to ever so vibrant has the first day it came into my life. I've talked to many people about it and getting perspective. In the past few weeks, God has shown up to help me handle this. So here is what I've come up with, with of course the "Big Guy Upstair's" help. I have feelings that seem to never end and in all reality I don't want them to end, That's why Ive been holding on so tightly this issue or now I can truthfully say this person.
But what else God has taught me that trust, truth and just the two people involved are the only things that really matter. A person very near dear to my heart said, That it should always be about me and him, no one else matters because they don't know how we feel about each other or what we both go through.

I've never could come out and say what my heart feels or what I'm struggling with. We all put on that mask sometimes, well mine just came off and it will stay off:)

We are not all perfect but that is why God is with us and we have His love within us always. He loves us just the way we are!! It just sometimes take something big for God to reveal Himself to us. We are definitely stubborn, but that is how God made us.

:) Well that's it for now.

Friday, July 16, 2010

...A dream is a wish your heart makes.


[simple rules of life:

1. If you do not go after what you want, you will never have it.

2. If you do not ask, then the answer will always be no.

3. If you do not step forward you will always be in the same place]

[You have to admit that love doesn't give you
the license to own a person forever.
Only a chance to enjoy someone's company for a moment.]

[If something is not happening for you,
it doesn't mean its never going to happen. It means you're not ready for it.]

[When something goes wrong, it's more important to decide
who's going to start fixing things rather than,
thinking who you're going to blame for it.]

[It's pathetic how we can't live with the things we can't understand. How we need everything labeled and explained and deconstructed.]

[If you love someone, tell them. If they don't love you back, at least you won't go through life wondering what would have been. ]

[I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned that this is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get. I learned to look at all the good in the world and to try to give some of it back, because i believe in it completely and utterly...Consider the lilies of the field. Look at the fuzz on a baby's ear. Read in the backyard with the sun on your face. Learn to be happy. And think of life as a terminal illness, because, if you do, you will live it with joy and passion, as it ought to be lived.]

[lucky is the man who is the first love of a woman, but luckier is the woman who is the last love of a man]